STOP ME IF YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE...

Jeg kan snakke

Norsk

Jeg vil beskrive meg selv som

I’ve been told by friends that I’m the funniest guy on the planet. They never did say which one, and let’s face it - these same people spend their free time downing fried pork rinds while watching old re-runs of, “My Mother the Car”, so their ability to offer serious opinions on anything other than the Atomic Weight of Cheetos is questionable at best. I guess I do have a weird, offbeat, obscure sense of humor, but I have to admit, even that is eclipsed by the astounding, God-given ability I have to wiggle my ears(really!). I’ve lived and worked in various places in Canada, Europe and the South Pacific(and Bali Hai never did call me), so I have at least a decent grasp on life outside the USA, which is something that has helped me grow as a person and partly made me into who I am today - a short guy trolling the Internet for women. I'm a pretty good cook, and love good food, good wine and good beer. I make a killer martini. I consume all things in moderation. I like hanging with friends and occasionally larger groups to hear new ideas and get different takes on life. I love all branches of The Arts, especially film, and enjoy going to movies, film festivals, plays, concerts, dance performances and art galleries. I also like hanging out at book stores, record stores, museums, antique stores, flea markets and Wal-Mart openings. I love road trips, both long and short. My politics are somewhat left of center. I’m an absolutely incurable romantic and make no apologies for that fact. I believe in honesty, loyalty and fidelity. I've been told that I give heart-stopping kisses and provide cuddles that have become the stuff of legend. Please hold your applause. By the way, my height as listed is correct but I've always dated women who were taller than me - no surprise there - so I’m open. The only thing I'm not open about is baggage. I left mine on the platform before the train pulled out of the station and am only interested in corresponding with someone who has done the same. If anything I've said here strikes you as appealing or at least interesting, then you are indeed an exceptional woman with exquisite taste in men and should not hesitate to contact me poste haste. Let's face it; to let someone with my rugged good looks slip through your fingers would be a travesty and you'd probably never forgive yourself. If, when you've finished the preceding, you're laughing, then you're probably someone I'd really enjoy talking to. On the other hand, if you find yourself frowning/grimacing/considering calling the authorities, then I'd pass and start dating that widget salesman who won last year's National Yodelers of America coveted Wish I Was Swiss award who keeps asking you out. Disclaimer: No widget salesmen were actually harmed during the writing of this profile. Later.

Registrer

Capricorn

My Kroppstype er

Slank

Min høyde er

4 '10 (1,47 m)

Øynene mine er

Hassel

Min etnisitet er

kaukasisk

Min Sivilsituasjon er

Skilt

Jeg har barn

Ja - bor ikke hjemme

Jeg vil ha barn

Nei

Min beste egenskap er

Smil

Kropps kunst

Vill ikke engang tenke på det

Mitt hår er

Skallet

Jeg har en eller flere av disse

Ingen dyr

Villing til å flytte

Nei

Min Utdanningsnivå Er

High School Diplom

Min nåværende arbeidssituasjon er

Selvstendig næringsdrivende

Min spesialitet er

Salg / Markedsføring

Minn jobb tittel er

CEO/SALES MGR./JANITOR/COFFEE MAKER

Jeg tjener så mye på et år

$15,000USD Til $29,999USD

Jeg bor

Alene

Hjemme

Venner kommer av og til på besøk

Jeg er en røyker

Nei

Jeg drikker

Ja - Sosialt

Når jeg gikk på skolen, var jeg

Klassens klovn

Min sosiale atferd er

Vennlig, Komisk, Flørtende, Utadvent

Mine interesser og hobbier er

Lese, Musikk, Tv, Filmer, Internett, Restaurant, Teater, Lage mat

Min idé av å ha det gøy er

Være med venner, Kino, Slappe av, Sove, Gå på kasino, Gå på konsert, Gå på museum

En ideel første date vil være

PREFERABLY WITH A WOMAN.

Jeg har alltid hatt lyst til å prøve

WRITING SOMETHING BRILLIANT ON ONE OF THESE DATING WEBSITES. OH WELL, MAYBE SOMEDAY...

Mine venner beskriver meg som

Vennlig, Tullete, En flørt

Min religion er

Åndelig men ikke religiøs

Jeg går på gudstjeneste

Aldri

Mitt mål i livet er

CONTINUING TO SCAN THE OBITUARIES FOR MY NAME EACH MORNING AND NOT FINDING IT THERE.

Min humoristiske sans er

Vennlig, Tullete, obskur

På TV ser jeg alltid på

Nyheter, Tegneserier, Dokumentarer, Drama, Filmer

Når jeg går på kino, går jeg alltid for å se en

Science Fiction, Komedie, Romantikk, Drama, Dokumentar, Andirektemeldingasjon, Skrekk

Når jeg hører på musikk, så hører jeg alltid på

Rock, Metall, Klassisk, Støvsuger lyder, Blues, Jazz, Soul, Punk

Når jeg leser, så leser jeg alltid

Klassisk, Fiction, Skrekk, Humor, Satire

Min idé av å ha det gøy er

HITTING MYSELF ON THE NOSE WITH A ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER WHENEVER I MAKE A MESS ON THE CARPET.

Hva finner du attraktivt?

Intelligens, Humor, Empati, Dristighet, flørtende, vett, Omtanksfull

Hva ser du etter?

HONESTY TOWARDS OTHERS AS WELL AS SOMEONE WHO CAN ALSO BE HONEST WITH THEMSELVES ABOUT THE KIND OF PEOPLE THEY WANT IN THEIR LIFE.

Hva slag forhold søker du?

Venn, Dato, Intim, Forpliktet