STOP ME IF YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE...

Puedo hablar

Inglés

Me describiría a mi mismo como

I’ve been told by friends that I’m the funniest guy on the planet. They never did say which one, and let’s face it - these same people spend their free time downing fried pork rinds while watching old re-runs of, “My Mother the Car”, so their ability to offer serious opinions on anything other than the Atomic Weight of Cheetos is questionable at best. I guess I do have a weird, offbeat, obscure sense of humor, but I have to admit, even that is eclipsed by the astounding, God-given ability I have to wiggle my ears(really!). I’ve lived and worked in various places in Canada, Europe and the South Pacific(and Bali Hai never did call me), so I have at least a decent grasp on life outside the USA, which is something that has helped me grow as a person and partly made me into who I am today - a short guy trolling the Internet for women. I'm a pretty good cook, and love good food, good wine and good beer. I make a killer martini. I consume all things in moderation. I like hanging with friends and occasionally larger groups to hear new ideas and get different takes on life. I love all branches of The Arts, especially film, and enjoy going to movies, film festivals, plays, concerts, dance performances and art galleries. I also like hanging out at book stores, record stores, museums, antique stores, flea markets and Wal-Mart openings. I love road trips, both long and short. My politics are somewhat left of center. I’m an absolutely incurable romantic and make no apologies for that fact. I believe in honesty, loyalty and fidelity. I've been told that I give heart-stopping kisses and provide cuddles that have become the stuff of legend. Please hold your applause. By the way, my height as listed is correct but I've always dated women who were taller than me - no surprise there - so I’m open. The only thing I'm not open about is baggage. I left mine on the platform before the train pulled out of the station and am only interested in corresponding with someone who has done the same. If anything I've said here strikes you as appealing or at least interesting, then you are indeed an exceptional woman with exquisite taste in men and should not hesitate to contact me poste haste. Let's face it; to let someone with my rugged good looks slip through your fingers would be a travesty and you'd probably never forgive yourself. If, when you've finished the preceding, you're laughing, then you're probably someone I'd really enjoy talking to. On the other hand, if you find yourself frowning/grimacing/considering calling the authorities, then I'd pass and start dating that widget salesman who won last year's National Yodelers of America coveted Wish I Was Swiss award who keeps asking you out. Disclaimer: No widget salesmen were actually harmed during the writing of this profile. Later.

Signo

Capricornio

Mi tipo de cuerpo es

Esbelto/a

Mi altura es

4' 10 (1.47 m)

Mis ojos son

Avellana

Mi raza es

Caucásico

Mi situación marital es

Divorciado

Tengo hijos

Si - No En Casa

Quiero tener hijos

No

Mi Mejor característica es

Sonrisa

Piercings, tatuajes…

Ni me lo pensaría

Mi pelo es

Calvo

Tengo uno o más de estos

Sin Mascotas

Me iría a vivir a otro lugar

No

Mi nivel de estudios / educación es

Diploma Instituto

Mi situación laboral actual es

Auto Empleo

Mi especialidad es

Ventas / Marketing

Mi trabajo es como

CEO/SALES MGR./JANITOR/COFFEE MAKER

Mi salario anual es de

$15,000USD a $29,999USD

Vivo en

Solo/a

En casa

Los amigos visitan ocasionalmente

Soy Fumador

No

Soy Bebedor

Si - Socialmente

En el instituto, era

El Cómico de la clase

Socialmente, me describiría como

Amistoso, Cómico, Coqueto/a, Extrovertido/a

Mis aficiones e intereses son

Leer, Música, Televisión, Películas, Internet, Cenar, Teatro, Cocinar

Mi idea de un rato estupendo es

Salir con amigos, Películas, Relajarse, Dormir, Ir al Casino, Ir a un Concierto, Ir a un Museo

Mi primera cita ideal sería

PREFERABLY WITH A WOMAN.

Siempre he querido probar

WRITING SOMETHING BRILLIANT ON ONE OF THESE DATING WEBSITES. OH WELL, MAYBE SOMEDAY...

Mis amigos me describen como

Amistoso, Bobo, Coqueteo

Mi religión es

Espiritual pero no religioso

Voy a la iglesia

Nunca

Mi meta en la vida

CONTINUING TO SCAN THE OBITUARIES FOR MY NAME EACH MORNING AND NOT FINDING IT THERE.

Mi sentido del humor es

Amistoso, Bobo, Oscuro

En la TV, siempre veo

Noticias, Dibujos Animados, Documentales, Dramas, Películas

Si voy al cine, siempre me gusta ver una

Ciencia Ficción, Comedia , Romance, Drama , Documentales, Animación, Horror

Cuando escucho música, lo que más me gusta es

Rock, Metal, Clásica, El ruido de la aspiradora, Blues, Jazz, Soul, Punk

Cuando leo libros, lo que más me gusta es

Clásicos, Ficción, Horror, Humor, Sátira

Mi idea de diversión es

HITTING MYSELF ON THE NOSE WITH A ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER WHENEVER I MAKE A MESS ON THE CARPET.

¿Qué te resulta atractivo?

Inteligencia, Humor, Empatía, Audacia, Coquetería, Ingenio, Detallista

¿Qué estás buscando?

HONESTY TOWARDS OTHERS AS WELL AS SOMEONE WHO CAN ALSO BE HONEST WITH THEMSELVES ABOUT THE KIND OF PEOPLE THEY WANT IN THEIR LIFE.

¿Qué tipo de relación estás buscando?

Amigo/a , Cita, Íntimos, Comprometido