STOP ME IF YOU'VE HEARD THIS ONE...

Je sais parler

Anglais

Je me décrirais comme

I’ve been told by friends that I’m the funniest guy on the planet. They never did say which one, and let’s face it - these same people spend their free time downing fried pork rinds while watching old re-runs of, “My Mother the Car”, so their ability to offer serious opinions on anything other than the Atomic Weight of Cheetos is questionable at best. I guess I do have a weird, offbeat, obscure sense of humor, but I have to admit, even that is eclipsed by the astounding, God-given ability I have to wiggle my ears(really!). I’ve lived and worked in various places in Canada, Europe and the South Pacific(and Bali Hai never did call me), so I have at least a decent grasp on life outside the USA, which is something that has helped me grow as a person and partly made me into who I am today - a short guy trolling the Internet for women. I'm a pretty good cook, and love good food, good wine and good beer. I make a killer martini. I consume all things in moderation. I like hanging with friends and occasionally larger groups to hear new ideas and get different takes on life. I love all branches of The Arts, especially film, and enjoy going to movies, film festivals, plays, concerts, dance performances and art galleries. I also like hanging out at book stores, record stores, museums, antique stores, flea markets and Wal-Mart openings. I love road trips, both long and short. My politics are somewhat left of center. I’m an absolutely incurable romantic and make no apologies for that fact. I believe in honesty, loyalty and fidelity. I've been told that I give heart-stopping kisses and provide cuddles that have become the stuff of legend. Please hold your applause. By the way, my height as listed is correct but I've always dated women who were taller than me - no surprise there - so I’m open. The only thing I'm not open about is baggage. I left mine on the platform before the train pulled out of the station and am only interested in corresponding with someone who has done the same. If anything I've said here strikes you as appealing or at least interesting, then you are indeed an exceptional woman with exquisite taste in men and should not hesitate to contact me poste haste. Let's face it; to let someone with my rugged good looks slip through your fingers would be a travesty and you'd probably never forgive yourself. If, when you've finished the preceding, you're laughing, then you're probably someone I'd really enjoy talking to. On the other hand, if you find yourself frowning/grimacing/considering calling the authorities, then I'd pass and start dating that widget salesman who won last year's National Yodelers of America coveted Wish I Was Swiss award who keeps asking you out. Disclaimer: No widget salesmen were actually harmed during the writing of this profile. Later.

Signe

Capricorne

Ma silhouette est

Elancée

Ma taille est

4' 10 (1.47 m)

Mes yeux sont

Noisettes

Mon origine ethnique est

Caucasienne

Ma situation maritale est

Divorcé/e

J'ai des enfants

Oui - pas chez moi

Je veux des enfants

Non

Ce que j'ai de mieux

Sourire

Art Corporel

Même pas envisageable

Mes cheveux sont

Chauve

J'en ai 1 ou plus

Pas d'animaux

Prêt(e) à vivre ailleurs

Non

Mon niveau d'éducation est

Diplôme d'études secondaires

Ma situation professionnelle actuelle est

Auto-entrepreneur

Mon domaine de compétence est

Vente/Marketing

Mon titre de fonction est

CEO/SALES MGR./JANITOR/COFFEE MAKER

J'ai gagné cette année

De 15,000 € à 29,999 €

Je vis

Seul/e

Chez moi

Des amis passent à l'occasion

Je fume

Non

Je bois de l'alcool

Oui - socialement

Au lycée, j'étais un/e

Clown de la classe

Socialement, je suis plutôt

Sympa, Comique, Séducteur, Ouvert

Mes passions et loisirs sont

Lecture, Musique, Télévision, Films, Internet, Dîner , Théâtre, Cuisine

Un bon moment pour moi c'est

Sortir avec des amis, Regarder un bon film, Me relaxer, Dormir, Aller au casino, Aller à un concert, Aller au musée

Un premier rendez-vous idéal, ce serait

PREFERABLY WITH A WOMAN.

J'ai toujours voulu essayer

WRITING SOMETHING BRILLIANT ON ONE OF THESE DATING WEBSITES. OH WELL, MAYBE SOMEDAY...

Mes amis me décrivent comme

Sympa, Neuneu, Un amour

Ma religion c'est

Croyances spirituelles mais pas religieuses

Je vais à la messe

Jamais

Mon but dans la vie c'est

CONTINUING TO SCAN THE OBITUARIES FOR MY NAME EACH MORNING AND NOT FINDING IT THERE.

Mon sens de l'humour est plutôt

Sympa, Neuneu, Obscur/e

A la télévision, je regarde

Actualités, Dessins animés, Documentaires, Drames, Films

Quand je vais au cinéma, je regarde toujours

Science-fiction, Comédies, Romantiques, Drames, Documentaires, Animation, Horreur

Quand j'écoute de la musique, ce que je préfère c'est

Rock, Metal, Classique, Le bruit de l'aspirateur, Blues, Jazz, Soul, Punk

Quand je lis, ce que je préfère c'est

Littérature classique, Fictions, Horreur, Humour, Satires

Mon idée du fun

HITTING MYSELF ON THE NOSE WITH A ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER WHENEVER I MAKE A MESS ON THE CARPET.

Que trouvez-vous attirant?

Intelligence, Humour, Empathie, Audace, Séduction, Bon sens, Délicatesse

Que recherchez-vous?

HONESTY TOWARDS OTHERS AS WELL AS SOMEONE WHO CAN ALSO BE HONEST WITH THEMSELVES ABOUT THE KIND OF PEOPLE THEY WANT IN THEIR LIFE.

Quel type de relation recherchez-vous?

Vrai‧e ami‧e, Rendez-vous, Relation intime, Engagement